Bon Idée

"Bon Idée"

Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love x2

Don’t tell your secrets to anyone
Because ideas are vulnerable
As soon as you say your idea out loud
Then it can go and live on its own
And you will miss it oh so much
And you will wait for it’s return
And you will wish it were your own
But ideas that left never come back home

Don’t tell your mother that you are afraid
Don’t tell your lover that your heart might break
Don’t tell your gods you no longer believe
Because as soon as you say it out loud they will leave you
And you will miss them oh so bad
And you will wait for their return
And you will wish they were your own
But gods that have left you will never grace your home

Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love x2 2

Don’t tell your secrets to anyone
Because ideas are vulnerable
As soon as you say your ideas out loud
Then they can go and live on their own without you
And you will miss them oh so bad
And you will wait for their return
And you will wish they were your own
But ideas that left will never come back home

The Slippery Slope

Why and how I am incapable of LOVE, I do not know. Perhaps the reason be fear...and lack of faith in my own.


Long have I waited for LOVE to come and in vain I have waited. Or perhaps in blindness, I have fallen. Numerous have I pretended to LOVE and nothing have I acquired. Only traumas and misgivings to my being.


Now, I fear those supposedly not to be fear ed of.


I fear attention.

I fear being liked.

I fear of liking.

I fear being more than liked.

And I fear not liking more.

I fear companionship for I fear attachment.

I fear comforting touches.

I fear being spoken to with words of endearment.

I fear being cared for.

I fear being LOVEd.

And I fear of being expected to LOVE in return.

I fear of saying that I cannot.

But I fear being left behind and not given a chance to try to LOVE.

I fear of failing the trial.

And I fear to admit it.

Because, again, I fear of being left behind for doing so. And I fear of not being given more chances to try harder.

So I try anyway.

I fear of finally giving up.

And I fear of letting go of the failure because I fear of admitting to myself that I cannot triumph over it.

But I eventually do.

I fear of not being let go because of one's LOVE for me. . .that, again, I fear.

I fear of hurting one LOVING me.

And I fear of one begging me to not leave one.

But everything eventually leads to separation and falling apart.

And I fear being lonely once again.



This chain of my notion ends to a conclusion:

"catching one's attention will eventually bring forth loneliness.”

-a notion like a metal cuff, binding my feet, restraining me from movement, nullifying my life, preventing me from living.

“The Slippery Slope is a fallacy in which a person asserts that some event must inevitably follow from another without any argument for the inevitably of the event in question. Event X has occurred (or will or might occur). Therefore event Y will inevitably happen.”

another shit

and so i go on with my loneliness... i see images of happiness everywhere i look. everywhere colors, everywhere smiles. but i feel nothing of the sort. all i feel are the spaces and holes that you have left me to fill up... again, with a false hope that there would be another you out there. but reality comes with pain.. you are the only rose in my garden and all the other women are just thorns. all i am saying is that im hopeless without you... without you, i am but a dead bird no longer afraid of boiling water. looking at the mirror, i see my eyes, not the way they were. they are now empty and spiritless. only water i see on them - those they call tears. but to me they are the only emotion i have left in my heart. for when you left me, my happiness, my hope, and my will to move on, abandoned me and followed you. i saw my life run away and fade in the mist... moreover, i saw your silhouette walk away. you have always been in dreams but they have dramatically changed since you have been gone. before, i was with you on a sunlit beach but now i am all alone in a dark cave feeling nothing but sorrow. i am saying this for i wish you open your heart for me once again.. i am tired of these lonely nights.. my love for you have grown deeper and i want you back..
tonight you said: "Love does not consist of gazing at each other.. but in looking in the same direction." why can we not do that?

Words

Was it not words that kept me so alive because of the promises contained in them? was it not words that made my lips red with love? was it not words that made me sleep ever so soundly at night thinking that there was nothing to worry about?.. was it not the words that you have uttered my love? bittersweet words that was not so bitter then.. instead so sweet that i circled my life around you like a moon around her sun. i could remember how the little words "you" and "i" meant the whole world to me... o how we loved those words, did we not my dear? but now, only i speak of those them for people to know about the love that was once perfect... but is now gone.
i would be a liar if i say that i shall be fine without you.. but as you part from me saying it will be better for us both, then i shall lie and say im alright.. i shall lie saying that you will better yourself as well.. though i believe that you would not, for you would not find another man that shall love you like i do.. on that i shall stand uncorrected. forgive my assumptions but i believe that you shall not.. ever be complete without me.
but dear of mine, if you wish to persist, may i request just one thing from you.. for the sake of my little incomplete heart's joy, send me still your letters.. even if they are not of love... for i wish to keep your words alive inside my heart. but if i shall not recieve any from you my love.. grieviously, i shall say that you have found another man.. curse him i shall not for i respect your decisions.. as always. and i shall lie once more and say that i will be happy as well..
rest assured my love that your words of love shall not be forgoten by this soul that lives only for you...
and now, i am almost out of words.. for i am out of you in my life...

You and I Both (by Jason Mraz)
Was it you who spoke the words that things would happen but not to me?All things are gonna happen naturally.Oh, taking your advice I'm looking on the bright side And balancing the whole thing.
Oh, but at often times those words they get tangled up in lines.And the bright light turns to night.Oh, until the dawn it bringsAnother day to sing about the magic that was you and me.
chorus:Cause you and I both lovedWhat you and I spoke ofAnd others just read ofOthers only read of the loveOf the love that I loved.
See I'm all about them wordsOver numbers, unencumbered numbered words;Hundreds of pages, pages, pages for words.More words than I, had ever heard and I, feel so alive.
Cause you and I both lovedWhat you and I spoke of (of, of)And others just read ofAnd if you could see me now
Oh, love, love, you and I, you and INot so little you and I anymoreAnd with this silence brings a moral story More importantly evolving is the glory of a boy
Cause you and I both lovedWhat you and I spoke of (of, of)And others just read ofAnd if you could see me nowWell, then I'm almost finally out ofI'm finally out ofFinally deedeedeedeedeedeeWell I'm almost finally, finally Well I'm free, oh, I'm free
And it's okay if you had to go awayOh, just remember the telephoneswell, they work in both waysBut if I never ever hear them ringIf nothing else I'll think the bells insideHave finally found you someone else and that's okayCause I'll remember everything you sang
Cause you and I both loved What you and I spoke of (of, of)And others just read of and if you could see me nowWell, then I'm almost finally out of I'm finally out ofFinally deedeedeedeedeede Well i'm almost finally finallywell out of words...

Your Cold Breeze

waking up to a new day, i find myself chilled to the bones with the frozen air... at that, i realized.. not even once did i have a warm day since you said goodbye to me. such a painful wound you have inflicted upon me. what a broken heart you have left me my love...
as the air froze me more, i remember you and i once in the rain.. two lovers passionately ignoring coldness as we embraced our warm bodies together. an angry rain poured down upon us but we barely noticed any anger in the world... just love... just you and i. my love, if you could remember, you were telling me o such a bright future... us together. you promised me an eternity of love. you spoke those words with such an intensity for your sweet voice.. with such assurance. i swear i could see you eyes shining as you uttered sweet words. such a bright future it was.. then you blew sweetly on my cheek... then to my ear. i felt your cold breeze but it was not cold at all for it was blown with what i felt was love and affection. i stood there, embracing you, watching raindrops falling on your angelic face, your hair wet yet so divine, and noticing your sweet scent that i could never forget. such a lucky man i thought i was for i had a goddess for a lover. then i see your lips... still like rose petals.. like a pink jade. i moved my face towards yours but i dared not to touch it.. i just returned the favor and blew softly on your forehead. for a moment, we were like gods - never caring about time nor pain.. just us immortal lovers.
such a fond memory it was my love. and a memory it will stay... for you said we could never be together again..
now, it is cold tears that pour down my face. and as i looked out my window, i closed my eyes and a cold breeze blew unto my cheek.. and then to my ears... i opened my eyes.. but there was no rain, no love, no you... and i cry some more for i remembered you once again...

Secret Crush

for the one a dare not to mention, not one strand of your hair i shall fail to take notice. your nostalgic scent i long to smell again, the sweet lips on your angelic face i desire to touch with mine, your voice filled with warmth i long to hear again, and your eyes... o the dear treasures that my memory takes precious care of. it is with these that made my heart love for the first and the last time like there's no tomorrow... how overly dramatic i have become because of you, but i care not for love is within me. i love you so dear... but i cannot show my feelings out in the sunlight for i am but a child who does not know how to stand up for my desires. my lips are too weak to speak of the three words i long to deliver to you; my body trembles with shyness; and my eyes avert yours for the reasons that i think you know. should i reveal my love for you, many heads shall turn in shock, many eyebrows shall raise, and many voices shall rage in anger. ashamed, i am telling you that i stand weak before them whom i consider gods that continue to haunt me - bringing forth my fears and frustrations over and over again. i am sorry my dear but i am trapped in a shell of fear. my love for you shall be kept known only by i for a while longer... or maybe forever. o why do you frustrate me so much my love? but no matter, i have a place where we could be free to express our love for each other. we shall meet there tonight and be happy for just atleast the night. My love, i shall see you in my dreams... in the place i have filled with yellow roses - your favorite flowers, doves, a sparkling river over the bright sunny sky, and a lucious green little hill where we could lay our picnic blanket. My love, meet me tonight i beg of you. i shall fill your empty longing heart and you shall do the same with mine. let us kiss the night away... let me take you in my fantasies...